i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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