I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
