There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize
