I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
My ass is underappreciated
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
