Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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