Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
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