I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
