You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
