dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Randomize
