I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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