No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize