New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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