It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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