Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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