let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
