My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
We smell like vodka and hangover
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
