Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I'm bleeding and have questions
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
