this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize