Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
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