Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
