The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
