Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
