You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
