we're blogging at a bar
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Randomize
