Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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