I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
