what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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