i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
