she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
