im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
