'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
You smell like a Billy Joel song
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
