if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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