Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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