apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
