I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Randomize