Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
