and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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