i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
