Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I CAN MOONWALK!
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
