i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
My day in three words: secret purse cake
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize