it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Damn victory sex feels great
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
