I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
You pole danced in your parka.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize