dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
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