...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize