You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize