...so i touched it.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
