im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
