Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
