I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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