if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize